It's getting harder to trust and to share: The Balsamic Cancer Moon

Bronze statuette of a veiled and masked dancer,  Metropolitan Museum of Art

Bronze statuette of a veiled and masked dancer, Metropolitan Museum of Art

Tomorrow will be three months that I’ve written and shared something daily. I don’t know if I’ll keep up the habit, but I at least wanted to make it three months.

In my birth chart Saturn is in Leo in the 5th House. The Lord of Solitude is in the sign of the Performer in the House of Self-Expression. Boo. Wherever Saturn is in our charts doesn’t feel fun. It feels lonely and hard though incredibly important. Saturn represents our great work and the blockage or fear that can keep us from doing it.

Yet Leo represents trust, pleasure and play. Like the 5th house it is ruled by the sun, and it also represents self-expression and creativity. In the symbolism of the New Moon, Leo has been our marching orders since July 23rd, and we’re renewing the class on Monday with the New Moon and solar eclipse. As a collective, we’re not finished with Leo.

But who really feels like trusting, creating, or performing right now? Can’t we just find nice, separate caves and hide?

The next few days the moon will be in the balsamic or waning crescent phase. This isn’t a playful phase. It’s mystical. It’s spooky. We’re half in this world and half out. This phase represents ego death.

Great. So how do we still do Leo?

Let in some of the world around you, but honor the Cancer moon and be selective. What you encounter from the outside or what you feel inside can make you want to throw in the towel. Please don’t. Look for the affirmations. Look for signs that what you have to share is helpful, life-giving and good. Look for signs that you’re loved.

I’m still reaching out today even though I didn’t really want to, even though some voices in my head said, “Stop it already.” “This isn’t worth it.” “What do you really know?” “Go back to bed.” I know every harsh message or excuse that can eat away at Leo and make someone hide instead. I know how to go away.

But a sweet message from a reader who found my website helped me get out of bed again this morning and write. I'm not really ready to go away, and I hope you aren't either. With Mercury now retrograde we may have to revisit or refine our message. But don’t completely clam up. What’s soft and vulnerable in you is important enough to share. Please hang in there and keep trying.

(Moon sextile Mercury in Virgo 5:18 a.m. EDT. Moon trine Neptune 10:16 a.m. Moon opposite Pluto 4:45 p.m. Moon square Jupiter 8:51 p.m.)